how to do the work

Every now and then, a book comes along that feels less like reading and more like being gently guided through a conversation you needed to have with yourself. How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera is one of those books.

Dr. LePera writes with honesty and care about the patterns we carry- sometimes without even knowing - and how those patterns can quietly shape the way we parent, relate, and show up in the world. What I love is that she doesn’t just point out the hard things. She gives you practical ways to pause, notice, and begin to heal. It’s both compassionate and empowering.

From a child-focused perspective, this book reminded me that the best gift we can give children is a parent who is willing to keep growing. When we recognise our own stories and gently rewrite them, we create space for our children to write theirs with more freedom and joy.

Children don’t only listen to what we say - they absorb what we do. When they see us working through our challenges, taking a breath before reacting, or showing kindness to ourselves in tough moments, they learn that growth is possible and that it’s safe to try again after mistakes. That quiet modelling can become one of the strongest lessons they carry forward.

One of the stories that stayed with me was a simple exercise in noticing your body’s response in moments of stress. That pause, that breath, becomes a tiny act of care—for yourself and for your child who is watching you learn.

This book is now available for loan to all families in our service. If you’d like to borrow a copy, simply let your Contact Worker know at your next visit or reach out to me directly as Service Manager. We’re always happy to make these resources accessible, so parents feel supported not just during visits but in the journey beyond them. 💛