raising a secure child

One of the books I find myself returning to again and again is Raising a Secure Child . It’s the foundation of the Circle of Security Parenting program, which has been shared with parents all over the world. At its heart, it’s about one simple idea: children thrive when they feel safe, seen, and supported.

What I love about this book is how clear the message is. Children don’t need perfect parents. They need parents who are present, responsive, and willing to repair things when they go a little off-track. That’s what builds security.

The Circle of Security helps parents picture what their child needs in everyday life. Children move around that “circle” all day long. Sometimes they want to go out and explore, sometimes they need to come back in for comfort. As parents, our job is to be their secure base (so they feel confident to go out and discover) and their safe haven (so they know they can always come back for reassurance and love).

I see this play out all the time in visits: a little one sets off boldly to explore the playground, then turns and runs back for a cuddle or a smile before heading off again. That’s the Circle of Security in action. The dance of exploration and comfort that helps children grow.

One of my favourite lines from the book is this:

“You don’t have to be perfect, just good enough - and good enough is built on connection.”

That reminder takes the pressure off. Parenting isn’t about never making mistakes; it’s about showing your child that no matter what, your love and care for them is steady.

If you’re looking for a book that helps you see parenting through your child’s eyes — and gives you a practical way to strengthen your bond. Raising a Secure Child and the Circle of Security Parenting program are beautiful places to start.

Families in our service wishing to borrow a copy of this book can contact me or make a request for it through their contact worker during their next visit.

💛 alwayschildfocused,

Jakki